Share your poetry, novels, music and art at The Writers Circle

The Writers' Circle

Part of the Magicians Battle (from CH1) by Chrisblue

RankMost active authors
1
Stephen (112)
2
louis kasatkin (144)
3
JD Higginson (478)
4
HuntersMoon12 (14)
5
Osmiara (15)
6
Bogman (21)
7
The Unforgiving Minute (52)
8
notebook (183)
9
OnlyShallow (9)
10
Liamc85 (56)
11
Preethi (5)
12
RedeemedAshes (35)
13
Eddie Larkin (108)
14
evakaye (284)
15
computer101 (35)
16
blackrose (56)
17
angeliki largatzis (40)
18
likeaninja (5)
19
brian dunn (224)
20
Aldice (38)
21
Jan Phillips (49)
22
Gina McKnight (3)
23
Arcturus (9)
24
Rozanne van Zyl (3)
25
XxGegexX (24)

Part of the Magicians Battle (from CH1)

By Chrisblue | Posted: 27 August 2008

Views: 328
In articles by Chrisblue
Report to a moderator
Glancing around for the reason he had stopped she searched with her eyes trying her hardest not to move and attract attention to herself.  Her eyes focused upon another man who had just turned a corner into the street. The circle of order would surly never run from anyone unless, and as Jesse looked on she saw sure enough a second order member.
He turned into the street and walked with an air of confidence, a blue light flickered into existence around him like a shimmering barrier.  He strode forward continuing towards the first man, his boots impacting lightly on the floor, his face covered in shadow by his hood and his cloak barely moving as he did.
The first mans head rose and the same light blue barrier appeared around him.
Both men raised their hands simultaneously, as a misty ball of blue light materialising in their palms distorting the air.  Both men stood contemplating, the blue light glowing brighter and edging white and then so quickly that Jesse nearly missed it, they propelled the light towards each other with such force that even at a distance Jesse felt the power rippling through the air, goose bumps appearing upon her arms as the hairs on the back of her neck raised as if a cold chill had blown down her collar.

The battle that continued was like nothing Jesse had ever seen before, she never knew magicians light could be so powerful yet she had never before witnessed two of the members of the circle of order battling before, she wondered if it was a play for power or to control the seven? She had only ever witnessed them pressing their magic upon others that never had much chance of ever fighting back, either to weak or to scared they never challenged them.  Even the best magicians of Yantaree never dared challenge one of the seven even when they were on their own although most often than not they were always certainly accompanied by black magicians, followers from their own city. 
Jesse's focus returned to the fight in front of her as hundreds of fine blue threads of energy rippled outwards in a half circle as each strike hit his opponents shield.  The air vibrated and flashed as an assortment of strikes battered each of the men.
All articles on this website by Chrisblue are copyright ©Chrisblue and should not be reproduced without the author's prior written consent. All opinions are the opinions of their respective authors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Writers' Circle.
Comments 
Carl
31 August 2008
Good stuff, Chrisblue. I enjoyed reading this a lot. I have a couple of minor comments - you have 'surly' instead of 'surely' in the third sentence. The kind of thing spellcheckers, don't point out! It's much easier to spot these things in other people's prose (I bet my prose is full of this kind of thing!)

In the second paragraph you might need to punctuate differently. Full stops instead of commas up until 'seven?' maybe.

Post some more stuff please!
Chrisblue
01 September 2008
Thankyou i know it still needs alot of work and i need to correct and fine tune a lot of it (like all 7 chapters up to now) grammar, punctuation and to check all the spelling which im poor at but im enjoying writing it and any all feedback is much apreciated , so thank you

Writer
Chrisblue

Total posts:
5
Roles: Writer
UNITED KINGDOM
i am a 27 year old, new to writing and just finding my feet, ive been looking to write a book for a few years now and finally decided to do just that.
Recent submissions 
Part of the Magicians Battle (from CH1)
Genre / category: Fiction
Magicians light
Genre / category: Fiction
The Caretaker's Light (Chapter one)
Genre / category: Fiction