Share your poetry, novels, music and art at The Writers Circle

The Writers' Circle

Seeds of Doubt - the opening of a novel by Shavalarj Hit

RankMost active authors
1
Stephen (112)
2
louis kasatkin (144)
3
JD Higginson (478)
4
HuntersMoon12 (14)
5
Osmiara (15)
6
Bogman (21)
7
The Unforgiving Minute (52)
8
notebook (183)
9
OnlyShallow (9)
10
Liamc85 (56)
11
Preethi (5)
12
RedeemedAshes (35)
13
Eddie Larkin (108)
14
evakaye (284)
15
computer101 (35)
16
blackrose (56)
17
angeliki largatzis (40)
18
likeaninja (5)
19
brian dunn (224)
20
Aldice (38)
21
Jan Phillips (49)
22
Gina McKnight (3)
23
Arcturus (9)
24
Rozanne van Zyl (3)
25
XxGegexX (24)

Seeds of Doubt - the opening of a novel

By Shavalarj Hit | Posted: 07 May 2009

Views: 255
Editor's choice
Editor's choice
Violence
Violence
In articles by Shavalarj Hit
Report to a moderator
Everything about this case had been unusual.  First, there was the time of death.  He didn't know the statistics, but 9 o'clock on a Monday morning was surely the most unusual time for suicide.  To him it was a time for beginnings not for endings.   Second, there was the phone call from the deceased.  He had dialled 999; told them his name, address and telephone number; told them that he was committing suicide and hung up.  The ambulance was there in 8 minutes.  It wasn't far and they hadn't been busy.  Getting there so soon after the call, they ought to have been favourites to at least get the patient to hospital.  But those 8 minutes had been more than enough.  The ambulance crew knew that resuscitation was not a possibility and the matter was passed on to the Police.  And thirdly, there was the consideration given to them - the emergency services.  The deceased had left  the front door was open and even moved the furniture to one side and put down plastic sheeting and sawdust to make the clearing up easier.  It was on the face of it, an open and shut case.

There was something puzzling him though.  It was possibly those stupid childhood riddles about a man found dead in a locked empty room.  At any rate, soon it was going to be an SEP - somebody else's problem.  That long overdue holiday was imminent.  He was due to fly out first thing tomorrow and he was finding it increasingly difficult to focus on anything else.

Sergeant David Johnson had 3 years of policing behind him and had packed a lot into those years.  He tried to focus on the job in hand.  He knew from experience that the next few minutes were vital to the investigation.  Make a mistake now and he could have a lot of awkward questions to answer long into the future.  The forensic team were called and on their way; the scene was cordoned off and he was in position outside the front and Dan, his partner, was out the back.  The scene of the crime, if it was a crime, was being preserved, that was his job.  The ambulance crew had returned to their ambulance and were keeping themselves to themselves.
All articles on this website by Shavalarj Hit are copyright ©Shavalarj Hit and should not be reproduced without the author's prior written consent. All opinions are the opinions of their respective authors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Writers' Circle.
Comments 
JD Higginson
07 May 2009
A strong and intriguing start. Looking forward to reading more.

Happy writing.

JD
Jennifer Munro
07 May 2009
I really like your title -nice one! You have a typo in this sentence - The deceased had left  the front door was open and even moved the furniture
zion613
07 May 2009
Very good! I enjoyed it very much, and it certainly makes me want to read more.

A few typos, but the grammar, spelling, and sentence structure are generally unimpeachable.

Anticipating the next installment... ;)
ChrissieJo
07 May 2009
Your opening paragraph kept my attention which for me, is a great start. I am sure you will in time give this more body. 

A very interesting ready. Hope you will post some more.
Cheers
Dragonwriter
07 May 2009
I enjoyed this a lot, and it definitely made me want to read more. Keep it up!

Dragonwriter
poppy101
07 May 2009
Great start really brought the reader into the plot - so what next?
Shavalarj Hit
08 May 2009
Thanks to everyone who viewed and/or commented.

I am working on the next installment.

Out of interest, I have just bought a very good book "How NOT to write a Novel" by Howard Mittelmark and Sandra Newman.  I haven't finished reading it yet and it is too early to say whether it will imporve my writing.  However, it is an amusing little read in its own right.
zion613
08 May 2009
That's a great book. It helped me a lot.

Looking forward to part 2... ;)
kreeves106
09 May 2009
I like your writing sytle and the subtle humor - especially SEP.    Not my usual genre, but it was so well written and mysterious enough to make me want to read more.   The flow was great, but not spelling out your numbers kind of put a tick in my chronic proofreading eye.  I hope you post more soon, I'd like to see where you go with this.
Yves44
04 June 2009
Great start, good set up and foundation - definitely enjoyed it but want more.

Writer
Shavalarj Hit

Total posts:
27
Roles: Writer
Dreading, Berkshire, UNITED KINGDOM
All you need to know about me, is my desire to remain anonymous and to make a decent living tapping away at a keyboard in the comfort of my own home. I am currently occupationally challenged. I am middle-aged, ... (Read more)
Recent submissions 
C
Seeds of Doubt - 5
Genre / category: Fiction
C
Seeds of Doubt - 4
Genre / category: Fiction
C
Seeds of Doubt - 3
Genre / category: Fiction
C
Seeds of Doubt - 2
Genre / category: Fiction
E
C
Seeds of Doubt - the opening of a novel
Warning: (Violence)
Genre / category: Fiction