“Wha do ya fancy?”
“Sorry?”
“Chinese or chipper?” Karen asks.
Oh right, “Give it a while hun, I’m still a bit stuffed from earlier.”
“Ahh come on” she says “dinner was ages ago and I’m bloody starvin.”
Looking to the clock above the door, ages, I think to myself… it was in it fuck, dinner was barley forty minutes ago, but there’s no way I’m gona say that to her, not in her condition. Dropping down onto my hunkers, I put my ear to Karen’s belly “He says, four star”
“He” she says, placing her hands on her hips, just like her ma does, knowing it will piss me off.
“Yeah, the meal deal for three… sorry what’s that son, peperoni passion, thin base, with extra pineapple, is that what you want?”
“No” Karen says, pushing me away “We had tha lass nigh, and she… yes SHE, wants a three in one, wit extra onion, from Angelo’s”
“Right, I’ll suffer another chinky, but there’s no fucking way were getting it from that kip. Last time we got something outa there, I was on the jax’s for at least an hour… and they forgot me poxy prawn crackers” I add.
“Ahh it will be grand hun, Debbie’s little sister is workin over there now and she says it’s only massive… and if we call before the X-factor starts, she’ll give us everything for half price.”
“Half price” I say not believing me own ears.
“Yeah” Karen says, smiling.
God I love this girl, but she’s absolutely insane when it comes to money. No problem spending five or six hundred on a pair of shoes or a bag, but will fight with a delivery guy over an out of date coupon for ten minutes in the rain.
“How much did ya spend today?” I ask her.
“Wha?”
“Don’t what me Karen, I’m asking ya how much you spent today”
“I don’t know, a bit, why?”
“Because you want me to eat a shit curry and I bet you spent at least five hundred quid.”
She looks at me, her face all scrunched up. “I never” she says, not looking me in the eye.
“Really?”
“Yeah, really” she says, her hands back on her hips.
“Right, how much were those runners” I ask, pointing to the J.D sports bag in the corner of the kitchen.
“They don’t count”
“They don’t” I say, laughing “Did they give them to you for free?”
“No, ya smart bastard… I got them for you, so they don’t count”
Only in a woman’s head could that make sense, I think to myself. “Right, what about this Monsoon bag” I say moving to the collection on the floor “Is there anything in here, that doesn’t count”
Just as I come to a stop beside the bags, a small voice, from the top of the stairs interrupts our argument. “Mammy, I don’t feel well” the little one says, padding down the stairs in his new pyjamas, something else that probably doesn’t count, I think to myself. “My tummy hurts.” He says
Fuck, I should have seen this coming. The little bugger is going to rat me out “What’s wrong wit ya darlin?” I hear Karen ask from the hallway, as I look for somewhere to hide. “My tummy hurts.” he says again, in that voice, the real one and not him looking for a day off school.
“Did ya eat somethin bad?” she asks. Shaking my head I pick up the house phone from the kitchen table and begin punching in the numbers for Angelo’s. “Two Mcflurrys” she screams coming into the kitchen, Jay in toe “You let him have two bloody Mcflurrys for lunch.”
“Sorry” I say, pointing to the phone in my hand. “Yeah Neilstown avenue, can I have a three in one, wit extra onions please.” The concession gets me nothing but a dirty look from Karen. All the three in ones in China isn’t gona save me now from an almighty ear full.
Putting the phone back in the cradle, I can see Karen gearing up for a fight, she has the high ground, but just as she opens her mouth, the phone starts ringing, saved by the bell. Turning, I reach for the house phone, I just put down, but that’s not the phone that’s ringing.
Taking up my mobile, I look at the display, there’s no need to tell Karen to ease up, she’s gone silent, this is my business phone and she knows the story. “Hello” I say hitting the green button.
“Hay boss” Davey says in his best traveller’s accent.
“Hay boss” I say back, bursting into a fit.
“Did ya see the game?” He asks me, back to his normal tone. This is code for anybody that might be listing. The key is to make everything sounds as naturel and fluid as possible. The game stands for the shipment we have coming in and he’s asking me have I heard anything.
“No” I say “was with the kid all day, who won?”
“United, we fucking hammered them”
United did win, but that mean’s fuck all; he could have easily said Liverpool or Arsenal. The fact that he’s happy is all I need to know, the positive attitude is the code, if he had of said he lost a few quid on the game or they had been beating, putting a negative slant on thing, that would have told me something had gone wrong.
“That’s great” I say “Drinks on you tomorrow?”
“Yeah I’ll pick you up at ten, game of pitch n’ putt and then a few pints ok”
“Sounds good, see yeah then” I say hanging up the phone
Karen’s all ears and smiles, she’s been with me long enough to know, not to ask stupid questions, the smile on my face is enough. It’s as simple as this, if I’m happy, she’s happy.
“Well Davey’s a happy man” I say giving Karen a wink.
“That’s great” she says “is he coming over, do you want me to order a few more chips or somethin?”
“No, no, he’ll be out with the boys for the night, you put the little man to bed and I’ll get the plates ready.”
The argument long forgotten, I can feel my appetite returning, must have been the stress of the day I think to myself. Putting out the last plate, the doorbell chimes “Christ that was quick” I say looking up at the clock.
“Hunny… foods here” I shout up the stairs as I head for the hall door.
Bang… it’s an ungodly loud nose, I fall to the floor, something’s just happened, but I don’t know what. Lying on the floor, I look at the fogged glass in the front door, there a small hole in it, with cobweb fractures spreading out in all directions.
Fuck, I mouthed as another thundering crack fills the hallway for a split second, leavening an identical hole in the glass a few inches from its tiny brother. The pain in my gut is getting worse, looking down at my hand; the penny finally drops as I see the blood.
Looking back to the glass I try to focus, but the pain and the fogged glass are a bad combination. A hand reaches, back, that much I can make out through the glass. Smash, a large sliver of glass crashes to the floor, I can see the balaclava clear as day now.
Not waiting for the next inevitable shot, I scramble to my feet, running for the kitchen. Bang, I feel the pain at the exact same time I hear the noise, maybe before even. The pain starts in the back of my hand, but quickly spreads to my entire body.
I don’t want to look down; I know I’ve been shot in the belly and hand, but my need to survive, my need to get away is enough to keep me moving. Almost taking the back door off the hinges, I sprint through my back yard for the wall and the safety of my neighbours.
One hand on the wall I drag myself up and over, landing in the Kelly’s roses on the other side. Thorns piercing just about every inch of my body I reach the Kelly’s Patio doors. Banging as hard as I can, I leave bloody prints everywhere. “What the fuck are you doing” screams Mr Kelly, seeing the mess I’ve made of his doors.
“Please” I say “Mr Kelly, let me in, its Declan” he looks at me for a split second before he opens the doors.
“Jesus’ Christ son, lie down, I’ll get you an ambulance” he says. There no real need to say, I’m already on the floor, blood pouring out of me. My eye on the kitchen door, I see Mrs Kelly coming in to see what all the fuss is about, no sooner has she seen me, when she begins to scream.
I want to apologise, say sorry for her patio door, her clean floor that I’m bleeding out on to, but I never get the chance. A final bang… takes my words, takes my taught, takes everything I every was or was going to be.