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First draft and very rough. It was written in a 30 minute lunch break at work so don't expect too much :-P
Enjoy,
JD
* * * * *
The wind whipped the snowflakes into complex patterns that whizzed through the trees. Buffeted now and then by the currents they seemed to pause in their flight and scatter upward to form delicate shapes in the air.
"Aren't they pretty?" Naeve asked her companion.
"Yeah, very nice," Gusin agreed noncommittally.
The boy didn't really care, if he was honest. Snow was snow to him but if it mattered to his friend then he was more than willing to endure the boredom.
"C'mon, Gus," Naeve said, nudging him playfully in the ribs as they trudged onwards. "Try and have a little fun."
"I just don't see the point," Gus protested. "It's just snow."
"Use your imagination," Naeve suggested. "And then it can be anything."
She pointed towards one particular cluster.
"See," she said. "A bird!"
Gus squinted hard but couldn't see what his friend could.
"It's just snow," he said.
"And there," Naeve said. "A mighty galleon sailing the currents of an unknown ocean."
"It's still snow," he insisted.
Naeve's exuberance took a knock at her companion's lack of enthusiasm but she was determined to get him to join in the game. She cast her gaze around for something - anything - to provoke Gusin's dormant imagination. The wind blew the flakes around them, whipping through trees and over the ground and the contours provided ample opportunity for odd flows and collisions within the air.
"There!" Naeve said suddenly, believing that she had at last seen something that even Gus couldn't deny.
"Where?"
"Just over there.and again!"
This time Gus did see the shape, a definite outline of a young boy, though he wasn't about to admit it.
"It's just snow, Naeve," he said, though he was slightly shaken by the shape he had seen.
It had seemed for a moment as if the definite outline had been moving playfully. It had only been there for a second but that had been more than enough to unsettle Gus' nerves.
"Can we go?" he asked, doing his best to keep the slight tremble from his voice.
"We've only just got here," said Naeve. "And you've got to learn how to have fun."
"Hmph," said Gus dejectedly.
Naeve glanced sideways at her friend and tagged him on the shoulder before darting away.
"You're it," she teased.
"Not playing," Gus said.
"Oh yes you are."
"Not."
"Fine," said Naeve. "But you're still it whether you're playing or not."
With that the young girl set off through the forests, giggling playfully. She knew her friend too well. He wouldn't stay grumpy for long. Gus waited until she was out of his sight before he grinned reluctantly and set off after her.
"Fine!" he shouted. "But don't expect me to enjoy it!"
Naeve heard his call but couldn't make out the words. She was already lost in a world of her own anyway. Surrounded by the snow and the ever-changing shapes that fuelled her imagination Naeve released her mind to drift with the snow. She imagined the snow having a voice and laughing at her simple, childlike joys.
Yet was it only her imagination?
Naeve stopped to listen and as she watched the snow began to swirl around her, surrounding her tiny form in a whirlwind of flakes. She stood at the centre, the calm in the eye of the storm, and listened as the laughter drifted in and out of focus on the winds. She glimpsed fleeting shapes amongst the strange riot of snow that enveloped her. It was a shape that she had seen only a few minutes earlier. It waxed and waned with the laughter and the sight of its frolicking lifted Naeve's heart with joy.
Without warning the shape of the boy sped off, racing amongst the snow. Naeve followed without a second's thought. She was caught up in the excitement of discovery and the thrill of the chase. Around trees and over boulders she chased it, running across frozen lakes and sliding down slippery slopes, until at last she came upon a great tree. There the shape paused, only for a second, before it whirled around the trunk and dropped through a gap in the mighty roots scattering a flurry of flakes in its wake.
This time Naeve did pause before she followed. This was a tree she had never before come across and its root system seemed to form a natural arch into the darkness below. Cautiously she approached, peering intently into the gloom. She jumped as a sudden burst of powder assailed her face. Laughter erupted forth and then ceased just as quickly.
With the fun now restored Naeve climbed forward and dropped down the hole into another world. A freezing blanket cushioned her fall and she batted the snow off her sensible dress as she rose and studied her surroundings.
Everywhere there was snow and it glowed with an inner light, though she could not discern its origin. Right now she didn't care. Gleaming glacial faces lined the tunnel that stretched away from the cavern she was in. They reflected the unknown light giving the whole scene a brilliance that took her breath away. She could hear laughter emanating from one such tunnel and followed it whilst all the while looking around her in wonderment.
"Hello?" she called out, hoping to gain some sort of answer from whatever it was that had guided her here.
The only response she gained was the boyish laughter.
"Hello?" she called again.
"Hello-llo-lo-o." her voice echoed mockingly back at her followed by the laughter once again.
Naeve continued on her way and noted the slight breeze that slowly rose with time and riffled the snowy ground on which she trod. She tried not to show she had noticed - even though the hint of a smile crept onto her features - but she was prepared when the wind suddenly increased and whipped the snow up into the form of the boy.
Naeve tried to get a good look at him but he paused only to gesture for her to follow before dropping into the ground along with the wind. Naeve smiled. He obviously wanted to play and that suited her fine, though it was seldom that she played when things weren't on her terms.
With a small sigh she continued on her way. There was no sign of the mysterious boy for quite some time, though she could still hear his faint laughter from up ahead. The path was climbing now and she couldn't even begin to guess where she was, never mind where she was heading.
She peered interestedly around her as she walked. The tunnel was bizarre in its construction. The walls appeared to be both translucent and reflective at the same time and, as she watched, faint fingers of frost travelled across one such surface. She stopped and looked closer and, as she stopped moving, so did they.
"Hello?" she said.
Hello.
The words appeared on the wall in swift, spidery writing that faded into view all at once rather than letter by letter.
"Where am I?" Naeve asked.
In my home, came the reply.
Naeve thought about that for a moment.
"Thank you for inviting me," she said.
You're welcome.
Naeve smiled.
Keep walking?
The suggestion came before Naeve had a chance to say anything more and she nodded politely and continued on her way, sharing her gaze between the path ahead and the frost-laden wall.
"Where am I going?" she asked.
To the ball.
Naeve paused. She hadn't expected that.
"What ball?" she asked curiously.
The Winter Ball.
That seemed like an obvious enough answer.
Naeve continued in silence but noted with glee as her unseen companion drew perfect shapes on the glassy surfaces for her. There was a rose, an embrace, a kiss, all immaculately constructed in the finest of details.
Then there was nothing - no more pictures, no more reflections and no more walls as the tunnel opened out into a huge cavern. Lights danced from a myriad of points across the multifaceted, curved surfaces, which were of the same material as the tunnels' own. The brilliance dazzled Naeve and she watched as the snow swirled upwards at the centre of the room, enhanced by the blinding light, to reveal the image of the boy at its centre.
The cheeky smile remained and he gave a courtly bow, which Naeve found herself replying to with a curtsey of her own. She had barely thought about it. It had simply seemed like the way things were meant to go.
The pair stepped towards each other and Naeve heard a distant music echo on the gentle winds that swept the boy towards her. They collided in a whirlwind of waltz and Naeve found that he was a very amiable partner despite how insubstantial he turned out to be.
Up close she could make out his cheeky, mischievous grin and the similar twinkle in his eyes. Not once did she question the peculiarity of the situation. Her daydreams had become a reality. It was as if the time she spent in her own head had simply been a preparation for her acceptance of this event.
"Who are you?" Naeve asked when they had been dancing for some time.
Jokul, the reply came on the wind.
"Who?"
Jack.
Naeve's eyes widened in the shock of recognition even as she was spun away from the boy and suddenly she was sliding down an icy slope. Down, down, down she slid with the pathway winding this way and that until, with one final abrupt scream, she slid through an insubstantial wall of frost and impacted with a bank of snow.
Naeve stood slightly unsteadily and got her bearings. She turned to look where she had come from yet there was no opening through which she must have exited. There was simply the great, formidable tree with its enormous, imposing roots, beautifully coated with the still-falling snow. Naeve circled the bare behemoth but failed to fathom how she had arrived here.
"Naeve?"
Her ears pricked as she heard the distant calls of Gus. He must have been looking for her all this time.
"Naeve? Come on. This isn't funny now!"
"I'm here!" Naeve called as she set off in the direction of his voice.
As she walked she thought back over what had just happened. She could tell Gus and rub it in his face about her eventful time in that mysteriously beautiful, underground world but he'd never believe her. Maybe this was one memory that was precious because it was hers.
She had danced with Jack, Jokul - call him what you will - on Midwinter's Eve.
All articles on this website by
JD Higginson are copyright ©JD Higginson and should not be reproduced
without the author's prior written consent. All opinions are the opinions of their
respective authors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Writers' Circle.
| Comments | |
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Your writing is simply amazing...
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Great writing but I wouldn't do this biblical stuff if I were you, 'she was sliding though she knew not how that had come to be.'
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Magical and entrancing - my favourite one of yours so far. Well done.
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very enjoyable,but all in 30 minutes?
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Aside from editing the line that friedegg commented on - yes, it was all in 30 minutes. The idea formulated in my mind whilst I was working and I wrote it in my lunch. Must have been one of those eureka moments.
JD
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Very nice! Of all I've seen on this site, this is the best so far! Just one thing: "collided in a whirlwind of waltz" - I love the language and imagery, but perhaps replace "collided" with something softer.
Keep writing, and I'll keep reading!
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ok so now i am OFFICIAL A FAN and will be adding myself very shortly
oh my gosh...
I love your writing, though I may be biased as like i said, I like this genre and have a weakness for it....i want more! It brings back plesant memories from my childhood actually, my imagination was my best friend back then, my school reports often sais that i have aproblem differentiating between fantasy and reality, ( i blame my nan)....so i really get feel for your naeve.
great stuff!!!
xxx
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I'm glad you're enjoying it and thanks so much for taking the time to leave such wonderful comments. I can only hope that future pieces live up to the acclaim.
JD
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Kudos
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From 31 votes
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Total posts: 417
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Roles:
Writer
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Manchester, UNITED KINGDOM
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A dedicated writer who holds future ambitions for modest greatness. Currently completing the final editing of my first full length novel. Fingers crossed that it's good enough.
All constructive criticism ... (Read more)
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