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Amazingly vivid imagery! The language has a sort of ethereal quality that fits very nicely with the concept you're trying to get accross. I love the sonnet form, and you use it very well.
Keep writing! ;)
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This is lovely - very light and floaty and warm.
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This is great, except one thing I noticed was that the rhymes didn't flow as well as they could have. I think that may have been becausw the rhymes skipped lines (if you know what I mean.)
I know that it is too late to change everything now, but just some advice for another time if you want to have a better flow.
Really nice piece of work
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Thank you, TaylorSwift97, for your comment. However, I do not understand your remarks about the poem not flowing and skipping lines. The poem is a Sonnet which is 3 x 4 line stanzas and 1 x 2 line stanza at the end. Each line is an iambic pentameter; the English way or writing sonnets. I haven't punctuated every line; it is not necessary in poetry, although there are those that disagree. Some poets do not capitalise the first word of each line, some do.
The important thing to me, is that you do like it and I appreciate that.
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