| Comments | |
|
|
Nice. I feel the frustration.
Keep writing! ;)
|
|
|
I'm quickly becoming a huge fan - the sign of a great writer is, I think, that they leave you with "a feeling of wanting more"...which of course you do. I hope to see more or your work.
|
|
|
I like it.
Some of your best stuff comes out of a short run. You don't have to have spent hours on it, that makes it lose it's authenticity sometimes. You may find you get more rawness in the emotion, if they're straight out of your head and into the poem :) x
|
|
|
JD this is hot. It sizzles on the page a mixture of desire and anger? I think you've portrayed more emotion here then yet seen in other work - grab hold of what made you feel like this and use it elsewhere.
|
|
|
Well, JD, you keep on doing it. Well done; it's a very good poem.
Reiner.
|
|
|
This is a good poem written in your voice, though I have to say it's more confusion and lust more than desire and frustration. The first four lines are the only lines where I feel any anger or frustration in the poem.
The poem in general sounds as if your body wants her, yet your mind refrains to touch her. Am I right? Anyways, it's a good poem, and I like the rhythm. Kinda makes it a battle between you and temptation.
Good Job!
DeUndrae
|