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The Spanish Lobster Restaurant
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The door is opened. The cook walks in with sunglasses and beach towels. He looks around.
Mad Cook: Is anyvone in? Oh vell.
He goes over to the kitchen. Later the waitresses walk in and the manager.
Mad Cook: Ah! There you are.My little pumpkins and manager.At your service.
Manager: Did you have a good holiday? I see you've brought back some.some.things. I suppose they're from your holiday?
Mad Cook: You are correct!
Waitresses: Back to work I suppose.
Manager: You are quite correct. you take after me I suppose. And why does everyone keep saying suppose?
Waitress 1: I suppose. it's the in word this season. or year.
Waitress 2: Anyway.get back to work!
They all go back to work (setting tables, getting aprons on.)The cook brings out the beach stuff and starts setting a holiday scene.with lobsters!
Manager: What are you doing?
Mad cook: Well.while I was out.on holiday.I decided to transform the old lobstere restaurant into the holiday lobstere!
Waitresses: What!
Mad Cook: It'll bring in new business! Duh.the whole point!
Manager: You.for once have a point.it will bring new business!
Waitress 1: Oh yeah.
Waitress 2: Of course. why didn't we think of that before?
Manager: Because we are all dumbo's! I mean idiots!
Mad Cook: What's an idiot?
Manager: sigh
They all set up the tables and the theme, when a couple comes in fighting.
Bob: Wow! What are we doing here?
Janet: We must have got carried away in fighting and ended up here.
The manager looks up thinking they're customers who are royal.
Manager: Hello. This is the restaurant and these are my waitresses.
Waitresses: Be our guest be our guest put our service to the test.
The visitors clap.
Janet: Oh well done!
Bob: Yeah. Well done.
Janet: You could at least try and appreciate this.
Bob: Ok. Oh bravo! Not working.
Janet: I don't know what I saw in you.
Waitresses: Neither do we.
Manager: Anyway. Table for two. Hold on one second. Cook! Get your large behind over here now. We have our first customers which are the second for the past three years! Hooray! Now. um. how about this table over here.
She points to table 11 and leads them over.
Janet: Oh thank you very much this is a lovely table.
The manager gets the menus and they sit down.
Manager: Now, let's go over.
Mad Cook: Aaggh! The lobstere is alive! It will eat me! I'm going to die!
Manager: Oh no! Waitresses go over the rules quickly please.
Waitresses: Ok.
The manager rushes over to the cook who is on the floor shivering while the lobster is chuckling away.
Waitress 1: We have been told to go over the rules of the restaurant by the master.
Waitress 2: And we always obey the master.
Bob: Oh just get on with it.
Waitress 1: Somebody got out on the wrong side of the cage this morning.
Waitress 2: Manners manners manners.is he like this often?
Janet: Yes from morning to night. I don't know what to do.
Waitress 1: We'll figure something out.
Waitress 2: Anyway, the rules.
Waitress 1: Do NOT open the windows, switch on the light, open the curtains or order anything else than lobster.
Waitress 2: Any questions? No then can I take your order?
Janet: Yes I'll have the.the.um.pickled lobster.
Waitress 1: With that would you like lobster or lobster?
Janet: Nothing else just lobster.
Waitress 2: Ok. Now, the evil man sitting opposite the lovely lady.
Bob: I'll have the. sausage and mash.
Waitress 1: Ok. What! You're just like the last one! Here we go! SAUSAGE AND MASH IS NOT ON THE MENU!
Waitress 2: I repeat. SAUSAGE AND MASH IS NOT ON THE MENU! Cook!
Waitress 1: Manager!
Waitresses: The customer wants sausage and mash!
The manager and cook storm over in rage!
Manager: What!
Mad Cook: I repeat what! It's not on the menu!
Manager faints as Bob and Janet storm out of the restaurant
THE END
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