The Writers' Circle

You know you how you all too often hear those words"you control your own destiny" well it took me a while but you don't you never will.Your future has been set out by those before you,those around you and strangely those who love you.

I'll never forget that morning we pulled up in my mom's beautifull BMW .Okay,it wasn't beautifull but it had a beautifull german engine and it was an envy in the ghetto of Scottsville. Well we pulled up infront of my grandmamie's glass kitchen.I always found it strange how similar my grandmamie's house was to my great aunt's house,her sister inlaw.She had always envied my great aunt.My great aunt envyed her too but for a very different reason.   We sat waitng in that car listening to another of my grandmamies and her son,Jamie's arguments.She had threatened to call the police .He had once again arrived home past 4 in the morning and well he drove over my grandmamie's roses.I always wondered why he never cared that his mother,his old and dieng mother sat every evening in that kitchen with a cigarette and a worried mind till the early hours of the next morning when he finally arrived and she finnaly stopped feeling like she could lose him any moment.The world was cold and she only wanted him to wear a jersey.He could catch a cold you know?

My grandmother was a strange women.She was so distubed.She beat my mother as a child but besides that she was crazy she was "bedonnerd".I still believe she made my grandfathers life go past quicker.I obviously don't remember the crazy parts because she loved me. She at first didn't agree to my mom being pregnant with me but she loved me.I question it sometimes but I know when she held me to her it wasn't because she had to, it was because she loved me.I believe. Thing is sometimes I do see that crazy.In my mother her nerves, her tears , her fury is never to far away to be brought out on me but she loves me right? 

I always found comfort in my 83 year old Great Aunt the envy of my grandmoher .My great aunt could heal anything.Especially an unloved heart. She had lived an adventure filled rich life contrary to my grandmother but my grandmother had 4 beautifull children.My great aunt had none.I sometimes think it was cruel of God to give someone with so much love no children.Her and her husband gave us their souls.What would they have given to their own children? but other times I think God wanted my great aunt to be refuge for my mom and her siblings.They were never alone.She really loved them.

Please critique this piece really comes from my heart .
Theres a 2nd chapter soon