The Writers' Circle

This story is very differant than my others! It is based on a true story! My true story!  It is only the beggining and I hope to get alot of feedback!                                                                                                          As I sat in the hall way I found myself praying! I hadn't prayed in years, but this was no ordinary day either. What would I do if she came out and said those words that I had been dreading? I gasp as the doctor emerged from his office. "Victoria" he said. I nodded and followed him into the small room. I had been quite precocious in thinking that I was immune to everything all these years. I had spent most of my life underestimating what I was doing to my body. I watched the doctor get comfortable in his chair. I waited impatiently twiddling my thumbs. He stared into my eyes and I knew the answer before even said anything. He blurted out "The tests were conclusive! It is definitely cancer!" Its funny looking back at that moment I didn't even cry. I actually said nothing but just got dressed called my husband, Bruce and waited in the front of the hospital for him to arrive.  We had been married for 3 years. He was different than most men I had met when I was younger! He allowed me to be me! He was kind and gentle but knew when to put his foot down. At times like these I wished I could drive but unfortunately my eyes were so bad that Bruce had to take me everywhere. I saw our white van pull into the drive. I was trying to decide what to say to him. So I was very surprised when I said "Everything is fine."  He looked at me for a second with those big blue eyes searching for truth. It was like the lie was lingering in the air! I knew at that moment a lie was my way out. I wasn't going to be treated different because of this. I was going to do things on my own terms. No one would ever know I thought. Little did I realize that this thought was a lie to me! When we arrived home that Monday morning I felt different. I felt sick from the earlier events. So I kissed Bruce and sent him off to work. Then ran up the stairs to the bathroom and vomited. I sat on the floor next to the toilet and it happened I began to cry! What was I going to do? I was lost. How could I face the people I love? I pictured myself telling them this huge secret and how they would react. I saw my mom crying and my husband he wouldn't even let me carry in groceries! They would all change if they knew. No I couldn't tell them or it would all change! Besides my kids didn't need more stress. Even though they were young I knew they would know what that word, cancer meant. I couldn't imagine the questions! Like are you going to die! What do you say to a little boy when asked that? Kyle my son was eight he loved baseball and could make your heart melt with those big brown eyes. I also had Hanna who was five. Hanna had been sick most of her life. She had a serious heart problem and also problems with her kidneys.  Destiny was the youngest and the hardest to handle. She was partially deaf and the most loving child of the group. I was the mother of three kids how was I going to get through this? My family was all I could think about! I didn't think poor me I'm going to die! I was more concerned about the way my family would carry on afterwards. Fear engulfed me! How did people deal with the news of cancer? How did they carry on like things were fine and not scream every minute of everyday!