The Writers' Circle

"You know, if you really had to pick someone to do this with," Mr. (or was it doctor?) Pierce told me over the phone. "It shouldn't have been with your best friend's wife."
"It was years ago," I said. "And everyone's adjusting pretty well, considering."
Not that I was a psychologist or anything, but he just wanted to know if my son would make his daughter crazy. Or make him a grandfather. Not that he was too young for it. The only way he could have children after spending so many years in some combination of selflessly putting education first or selflessly putting in long hours at the office had forced him to procreate with a much younger woman. He looked old enough to be Sage's grandfather. 
But back in his day, stuff like that didn't happen. 
"Did he even introduce you to some woman who you were friendly with?" Mr. Pierce asked. 
Friendly? What a euphemism. He knew what I had done with Lenore. Not with too much detail- we were never close enough for locker room talk. He sent me a card to congratulate us when we got engaged, the type that came with an implied "PS-why did this take so long?" at the bottom. He never even made the guest list to the wedding. But he knew what couples those days were doing. Especially at our ages, when we felt like we were owed at least a few nights together for all the years when we were single and everyone else was married.
And all that was summed up with the word "friendly". 
"Yeah," I said. "He introduced me to my fiancée. But it didn't work out."
"Did you ever tell her about you and his wife?"
Yes. Not that it was any of her business. She accepted it. Lenore accepted that men screwed up like that. And she knew I wanted a second child, but she hadn't been around to give me one at the time. 
"That's really not any of your business," I said. "And besides, it's closed. For your information, Anthony and Desiree have always had an open relationship. When she wanted another child, I ended up caving in. But now I kept contact. I paid my dues back then and I have custody of him now. Liam is a perfectly good boyfriend for your daughter."
"They broke up."
"Her loss." I heard Kira knock. She was the only one who knocked at my study. "Gotta go. There's four kids in this house now." I slammed the phone down on its cradle.
"Come in!" I yelled. 
"Can I at least have some red wine?" Kira asked. 
"No."
"You let Liam."
"Liam isn't a recovering alcoholic."
"I keep telling you- lush. I was never chemically dependent!"
"It interfered with your normal life."
"My normal life was back in Chicago. This is the apocalypse."
I shrugged. What could I say? She had a point.  
"I felt like that back when my three brothers, my mother and Liam had terminal diseases," I said. "But alcohol really isn't going to help. And red wine really wouldn't do anything, so there's no point in begging."
"I was alone with two kids- a ten year old and a six year old- for three weeks and now I'm not allowed to have any booze! I did everything! I stopped going to school on Tuesdays and Thursdays because with Karsen puking all the time, we wouldn't ever get caught up on laundry."
"I realize that. And right now, I just want you to be fifteen. Liam never came in here once begging me for alcohol."
"I just had a little bit at the end of the day, just to cope. Plenty of people- single moms- do that. It's stressful!"
"No one could tell anything was wrong, you were drinking so much. Liam told me he just thought you were another party girl."
"And you wouldn't step in for that unless I had a brother with cancer?"
"My mother had four children and I was the only one who lived to adulthood. That was really what killed her. Disease had nothing to do with it."
Kira stamped, the exact same way Abby did when she was mad. She knew I was right.
"And another thing," I said. "I know you wouldn't come in here to ask for something I'm not going to give to you. You would have snuck it."
"I-I. If I'm disturbing you, I'll leave."
"I think right now you just want a parent. Someone who doesn't expect you to be brave all the time."
I started hugging Kira. Five seconds later, she was sobbing.
**
	Kira's schedule, before she moved in with us, was perfectly designed to keep anyone from suspecting anything. She went to school on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, usually sober or at least to the point where no one would notice. She didn't sleep so she spent those nights at dance clubs or bars and after-hours hubs, drinking heavily. She met Riley a few months before at one of those venues. When she went out drinking, he watched the house. Riley had done something seriously wrong and when Kira met him, he was just coasting through his twenties, trying to get favors wherever he could. "He's only good in emergencies," was all Kira ever told me about him.  Sometimes, when Karsen got sick at night, he'd spout out something to Riley. 
	Riley came to visit us once or twice. I could sense some sexual tension between him and Kira, even though Kira had a boyfriend most of the time they were together. He was there every time she came home drunk. And while Kira was still only a young girl, she didn't look it. Five-eight, blonde, leggy and slender, she was the exact type of girl Riley dreamed of.
	But she didn't live the same life that the centerfolds in the porn magazines he thumbed though seemed to be trying to entice men into. When she wasn't drinking, she was dealing with her life.
	At first, Anthony was with him, but that actually made things harder. He got drunk all the time and sat in front of the television. Kira was on her own for getting Abby to kindergarten and taking care of Karsen. 
	"It's the flu," Anthony told her every time she suggested they take him to a doctor. "He should get back to school."
	Anthony didn't care where the younger kids went, as long as they were out of his sight. He tried to get Abby sent to a treatment facility for mentally ill children, but stopped when he realized that he couldn't send Karsen too. 
	Kira left Karsen three days a week, for a few hours so she could get to school. His room was set up so that he wouldn't need too much help. But every time she could, Kira snuck back home on her lunch break to make his bed. Every morning, he puked.
	"All stomach bile," Kira told the doctor. "Although occasionally I made him get a protein shake down."
	That was my son- chronically ill and still trying to build up muscle.  
	After school, Kira somehow took care of Karsen, Abby and placated Anthony. She still got her homework done. Except for her absences, it was difficult to notice that anything was wrong. And her teachers just thought it had something to do with her twin brother's disappearance a few months ago.
	"She did look stressed out," her boyfriend at the time, Eric, told me.  "But with her, it's really hard to know when anything's wrong."
	He worked two jobs in addition to going to school full time in addition to sports in addition to getting perfect grades. Liam told me he was the only guy at Conway prep who wouldn't notice if his girlfriend stopped picking up the phone when he called at certain hours.
	No one knew anything until Kira called me, explaining that her parents were gone and she'd never seen her brother that sick before. The only person she called before was her cousin, Nate, who was on business.  Although Nate was her best behaved cousin, he was still self-centered. Solving someone else's problems, or even referring them to someone else for help, wasn't something Nate ever did.
	"You're my godfather, right?" Kira asked. "So if something goes wrong, you have to help?"
	I didn't have to, but she sounded panicked.
	"Where are you?" I asked.
	"At home. Karsen's really, really sick and I'm not sure what to do."
	"Karsen?"
	My other son. They both were at risk for gastric cancer. 
	"Karsen," Kira replied. 
	"What's wrong?"
	She gave me a list of the symptoms.
	I wrote them down on a piece of paper, although I didn't really need to. I had the symptoms memorized. I'd seen it happen too many times.
	My assistant came in. "Cathers here to see you," she said.
	"Cancel it. There's a family emergency."
	"Emergency?" Kira asked. "Dad said it was the flu."
	"Listen, I'm coming over. I know one of the best oncologists in the city. We're going to take Karsen to see him."
	"Oncology? Like a tumor?"
	"I hope to hell not, but there's a really good chance."
	Kira dropped the phone.