The Fabulous Mr. Frog by unbridledspirit

(I wanted to try my hand at a children's poem..."The Fabulous Mr. Frog")

By leaps and bounds I get around,
Sitting quietly then with a boisterous sound,
I'm off to explore the muddy ground,
Jumping high over the grassy mound.

I consider myself a green beauty,
Catching flies while croaking is my only duty,
Some search for treasure but insects are my booty,
Seeking higher ground I have no time for feeling moody.

I'm lovable you see with warts and all,
Splashing 'round in the pond while the grass grows tall,
Then relaxing on a lily pad to await nature's call,
To eat the newly hatched spring life in preparation for a less bountiful fall.

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Comments

bobchoi

13 December 2009

Unbridledspirit, I like it!  May I suggest changing the last line to...?

Eat my fill in spring and hibernate in the fall.

HappyBird

13 December 2009

I love it! Very cute! I can see this poem in a children's book of poetry.

unbridledspirit

13 December 2009

Bobchoi..thank you for your suggestions.  I like the first part of it but unfortunately the second part of the line wouldn't work because frogs hibernate in the winter.

Happybird...thank you for your feedback.

audreyhepburn

14 December 2009

Nice!
I could picture this being published in a children's magazine or anthology... but I would suggest working to keep a  consistent rhythm. 
audreyhepburn

unbridledspirit

14 December 2009

Thanks for your feedback Audrey.

taylorswift97

09 January 2010

Adorable! 

taylorswift97

unbridledspirit

11 January 2010

Thanks Taylor!

taylorswift97

21 January 2010

No problem :)
One thing that I would say though, is that all of then words at the end of each line and each stanza rhyme...not just, say in the 1st line & 3rd. In my opinion, changing that might give it a better flow, but I'm not even sure what you would change it to, so it's not much help. 
It's great how it is, but just something for you to think about if you would like to.

Happy Writing!

taylorswift97

Also see: Season's Greetings a Poem (debbie reynolds) • CHRISTMAS!!!! (Beaner) • I Remember (unbridledspirit) • Snowflakes (taylorswift97) • Faith (TheDarkNarrator340) • Life by the threads (TheDarkNarrator340) • First Frost (audreyhepburn) • Canada Geese (Haiku) (audreyhepburn) • Freshly Fallen Snow (audreyhepburn) • Heartbroken (iram 24)

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Writer unbridledspirit	Total posts: 171
Roles: Writer

I am a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who is passionate about writing Contemporary Christian lyrics and poems. I also love horses because of their wonderful spiritual nature. I would say that I ... (Read more)

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Genre / category: Poetry