The Writers' Circle

We had all agreed to come in over the holidays... That's how dedicated we were... Give up a day of our holiday to rehearse... I was at college, studying performing arts, intermediate group (I do everything the hard way) and we had all come in during the holiday. We had the college to ourselves... Quiet, peaceful, we could get a lot done that day. 

But upon entering the Ben Kingsley theatre the most ghastly, otherworldy smell greeted us, assaulting our senses, knocking out our collective equilibrium... It. Was. Awful. The theatre was also hot... Really hot... And it stunk... We all searched for the cause... Every one of us looking everywhere... Where was the smell coming from? Eventually in the wings of the theatre, sat atop a radiator that had been left on throughout the week at full blast was discovered a blue plastic bag... The smell was coming from inside the bag...

We dared each other to peer inside, each one of us reluctant to venture closer... Finally it was decided that I would be the one to inspect the contents of the mystery bag... Hey, we had a show to rehearse... We couldn't waste any more time... I stepped forward... And as I gingerly inched my way towards the bag the foul stench grew fouler... Beads of sweat gathered on my forehead partly because of the radiator, partly because I was nervous... What would I find inside? What was it that could produce such a vile smell? I knew of only one thing... Surely there is only one thing on this planet that can smell like that? Somebody has shat in that bag and left in on a radiator and turned the temperature all the way up... And left it there all week long as some sort of heinous practical joke... Possibly one of those slack jawed, slope browed, knuckle dragging, cave dwelling, mono syllabic reprobate P.E students, whose department was closely situated near the theatre. The P.E students and the performing arts students never really got on. They feared our creativity, their tiny sport minds bamboozled by our abilty to learn and remember things... We were rival gangs, Jets and Sharks, Montagues and Capulets, people and animals... It must have been one of them...

I retrieved the bag, opened it and now with an almost immunity to the odour, as though my sense of smell had taken a leave of absence I stuck my face into the bag... The smell didn't bother me any longer... But the sight... Oh the sight... For in that bag was a squirming, maggoty mess... I had no idea what the maggots were feasting on but they were certainly having a good time in there... It was like an orgy of maggots... So many maggots in one place... No, I didn't know what they were dining on, but it was something large... And dark... The sight of this almost made me coat the party of maggots in my own bile... It was truly a disgusting sight up close, my face was inches, mere inches from this abomination... Fortunately our teacher, a great man by the name of Kerry Jones was on hand to tear the bag from me and rush with the bag from the theatre... For a while everyone in the theatre wondered aloud about the contents of the bag, discussing it, musing over it... What was it? I didn't take part in the conversation... I was over in a corner holding my stomach and wearing a jade mask... The head scratching continued unabated... Until finally after what seemed an age the theatre doors flew open... There in the doorway stood a silhouetted figure... Who was it? It was Kerry, he had returned to us... A hero, a saviour... He had ridded the theatre of this foul parcel... But the contents? What was the contents? Speak to us oh Kerry... Speak...

Kerry slouched into the theatre with his trademake slouch... His face almost as green as mine... He stood in the middle of the room before us... I joined the rest of the group and Kerry... Kerry stood silently for what seemed like an eternity before sullenly opening his mouth and speaking... "It was a sheep's heart" is all he said... A sheep's heart? How did that get there? More to the point how did he know it was a sheep's heart? Does Kerry have a secret laboratory deep in the bowels of Pendleton college? A secret clandestine hideaway where he acts as the college's very own phantom, conducting his experiments... I don't know how he knew it was a sheep's heart to tell the truth... All I knew was that we needed to rehearse...

The group agreed... And the rehearsals resumed and carried on as normal throughout the rest of the day... All the while Kerry sat in a corner holding his stomach, wearing the jade mask.

Yes, those were indeed the days...