Empty Birdcage by audreyhepburn

After that lovely finch disappeared, I have been lonely.  
So very lonely.  
No one to sing a lovely song.

After that lovely finch disappeared, I have been sad.
So very sad.
No one to sit with me.

After that lovely finch disappeared, I have been miserable.
So very miserable.
No one to sit here with me. 

Where has she gone?
She should come back.
To her friend,
The empty birdcage.

All articles on this website by audreyhepburn are copyright ©audreyhepburn and should not be reproduced without the author's prior written consent. All opinions are the opinions of their respective authors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Writers' Circle.

Comments

audreyhepburn

03 January 2010

My brother's owl finch died last May.
I thought I might try to write a poem about her in a creative way.  I thought writing from the birdcage's perspective would be new and different.
Audrey

taylorswift97

04 January 2010

This one is definetly a more serious one. Very expressive, although it is pretty short.  I love how it is from the bird cage's point of view. I love when people write things from different perspectives. 

The only thing that I'm not sure about is that the two paragraphs miserable and the sadness one are very similar - mainly the last line in both, so you may want to change one of those.
Other than that very good.

taylorswift97

audreyhepburn

04 January 2010

Hi 
Thanks 
I wrote it spur of the moment... like most things I write.
Bringing the new short story to school tomorrow.
Audrey

JD Higginson

05 January 2010

There's some intense feeling in this poem. It gave me goosebumps. Brilliant.

JD

audreyhepburn

09 January 2010

Thanks!
Audrey

Anonymous

25 January 2010

I agree with JD...
Goosebumps........ 
Nice job (once again; I already commented earlier hehe.)

audreyhepburn

26 January 2010

Thanks anonymous. 
Audrey

Also see: I'm Feeling (audreyhepburn) • Freshly Scrubbed Floor (audreyhepburn) • False King (Benclarke) • Bag Tree (Benclarke) • Chew Toy (audreyhepburn) • The Green Roses (audreyhepburn) • Rabbit Trap (Benclarke) • Alcohol (Benclarke) • The Wrong Bathroom (Not Haiku) (Benclarke) • Each Moment . . . (Sourceling)

Kudos

From 3 votes

	Vote for this
	Add a comment
	Favourite this

Writer audreyhepburn	Total posts: 449
Roles: Writer

CANADA

I am a 13-year-old and I write for everyone, kids and adults alike; my dream is to win a world-wide literary award. Please comment on my writing; I like to know what people think. I really appreciate constructive ... (Read more)

Recent submissions

MAY WRITING CLUB!!

Genre / category: Fiction