Kudos 6.63 after 9 votes |
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The moon pours through my window
Its light gives the room a glow
Suddenly the sky is filled with clouds
The moon's light no longer shows
The thunder bangs
Angels are bowling up above
Lightening flashes
Yet I still don't wake up
The rain drums against the walls which surround me
Though I'm asleep
I can hear the sound of peace
To give me a night of sweet dreams
Kudos 6.63 after 9 votes |
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Comments, critiques and replies
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I loved every word of this poem. In a way its sweet and gently becuase you talk about the moon and peace
but then there's sudden thunder and lightening. I loved this line, 'As if angels are bowling up above'
very inventive. | iram 24 [77] | 01/02/2010 |
I'm not sure I agree with the above. I like the rest of the poem, the flashing lightning and so on, but
the image of the angels bowling jars a little with the rest of it. | laughingkat27 [35] | 01/02/2010 |
Another good one!
Audrey | audreyhepburn [474] | 01/02/2010 |
Really felt the storm your words using angels bowling and rain drums; are great expresions to emphasise
the storm
a little puzzled at the last three lines sleeping through the storm
mature gent | mature gent [110] | 07/02/2010 |
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