THE CAFÉ

THE CAFÉ This is an editor's choice!

By Festerocious [55]

Bad language

Kudos 4.00 after 4 votes

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I didn't look up from my paper as the bell above the door rang, though I can see whoever has entered from the corner of my eye, I don't acknowledge them. Its not that the article I'm reading is very interesting to be honest, or that I've no concern for the new arrival, I just don't feel the need for companionship, not right now, and eye contact usually leads to polite conversation. Whoever they are I can hear them as they drag a chair from below the table, before hanging their dripping wet coat over the back of it. I'd guess it was a man by the way he coughs; either that or it's a woman on hormone tablets.
The paper holds nothing really worth my time, not with the state of the world at the moment, its all debt, death or politics, plastered in between the adverts for hair products or electronic goods, the worlds gone lazy, too lazy if you ask me. Not like the old days when people had to work hard for their money. No, now its all credit cards and benefit claims, the population needs a good kicking.
  The odd good news story sometimes caught my eye, you know the ones, how Mr B Standish of Eccles was reunited with his long lost sister in the local Bingo hall, after thirty years apart they met again when they both won the major prize, or how Mr J Kennedy sold an old painting he'd found tucked away in his loft for three million pounds. But today it was all rubbish, how unemployment was on the up and industry was on the way down; even the page three girls seemed saggy.
I sip my coffee as the newcomer walks over to the counter behind me, standing patiently as he waits to place his order, rhythmically tapping his fingers on the worktop in time with the music on the radio. Now please don't get me started on the music of today, all that synthesised crap and irritating voices that grate on your nerves two seconds after the song starts, and all they sing about is sex, drugs and violence, its not like the music I grew up with, not that I'm old or anything, Buddy Holly or The Shadows played their music way before I was born. No, my music was the 80's, when Nick Kershaw's 'Wild Horses' or Pat Benetar's 'Love is a battlefield' filled the airwaves, now that was real music. Music that made you stop and think, with lyrics that actually told a story.
I can hear the man behind me as he sighs, bored of waiting to be served, and that's another thing, people today have no patience, life flashes past them so fast that they miss it, so eager to be somewhere else. I can hear him moaning, muttering to himself as he gives up waiting, storming passed me, he grabs his coat and slams the door behind him as he goes, leaving me thankfully alone once more with my paper.
I need a fag, but the rains coming down so heavy outside and I can't be bothered getting wet, god its a stupid law, not letting you smoke indoors, if this was my café I'd let people smoke in here and damn the law to stop me. People should be allowed to do what they liked more, I don't mean things like murder or rape, oh no that need to be controlled, serious crimes need punishment, but little things that don't really do anyone any harm should be ignored. Secondary smoking is a myth like Global warming, it's just something the government boffins have made up to add another level of control into our lives, one more way to tax us and keep us down. 
   The bell rings again and a young woman walks in talking on her mobile phone, she has a nice voice but a foul mouth, every third word's a swear word. I can hear her talking about her boyfriends antics in the bedroom, or the lack of it by the sounds of it, and how he doesn't have the slightest idea what to do. She laughs at something said to her, calling her a dirty bitch as she passes me by to stand at the counter. She's wearing nice perfume though, masked by the smell of stale cigarette smoke, but still strong enough to make me look up at her.
   Her short skirt and knee high boots seem to be the fashion nowadays, not that I'm complaining, oh no, as far as I'm concerned there should be more legs and ass on show. But not for fat chick though, or ugly ones come to that, but for a certain group it should be law. She's not actually bad looking, if she scraped off the ton of makeup she's caked to her face. With her smallish button nose and deep blue eyes she's quite a looker, with her blonde hair plaited into a pigtail that hangs down her back. She continues to talk as she chews on her gum until she spots me looking at her and turns around, telling her friend that a pervert is watching her.
    I would object to that, but the fact she's turned her back to me just gives me something else to look at instead. I try to ignore her conversation; she's explaining now what he does to her in intimate details; the idea of having a private conversation seems to be lost on her as she talks about bloody girth and stamina.
      In my day, before all these mobile phones, people talked quietly, in hushed voices, as though you sat in a library and you respected other people. Not like today, respect died a long time ago, along with common sense and community pride, people are just lazy now, very lazy. We had less then but valued it more; everything's throw away now, to be used and tossed into the gutter, just adding more rubbish for our future generations to have to deal with.
      I sip my coffee before turning the page, scanning over my horoscope for today before moving onto the cartoons, none of them look funny, but its easy reading. The girl swears about the poor service and storms out of the shop, spitting her gum outside the door as she pulls a fresh smoke from her pocket and lights it before leaving. The door slowly closes creaks on its hinges before clicking back into place. I check my watch as I finish my coffee; folding the paper carefully back together before I stand and wipe the table down, a few moments before the bell rings again.
"Thanks for watching the café for me Bob" John smiled "I told you it'd be only for half an hour. Did you have any problems?"
"None at all" I reply, putting the cup back behind the counter, "It's been dead in here, must be the bad weather, people today don't seem to have the get up and go they used to"

Kudos 4.00 after 4 votes

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Comments, critiques and replies

TitleByDate
Hey Festerocious,

Your book must be finished . . . it's been a while.

Excellent narrative. And funny too.  Great description.  Especially the short-skirted girl who talks about
girth and stamina :-)

There should be a 'hanging' 'hang' in the first paragraph, a missing apostrophe on boyfriends either before
or after the 's' and an apostrophe'd 'perverts' would indicate a pervert's or a pervert is watching her.
 Otherwise, most nearly perfect.

Grampa
Grampa Pogi [512]03/02/2010
Thanks Grampa Pogi.

This is another one of my written in a day pile.
Thanks for the typo spotting.

To answer the other question : 
Yes, the books finished (110,000 words) and I'm a quarter way into book Two. It needs a final read now,
I've been advised to read it aloud to myself so I can adjust the punctuations etc, feel the flow of the
work and spot stupid mistakes etc before anything else.

I'll keep you posted if it gets anywhere.
Festerocious [55]03/02/2010
Very good, Nice easy read that pulled you along into the story. I thought that the narrative was excellent,
and the descriptions well weighted, and nice to see it rounded of with some humour.
churchmouse [142]03/02/2010
You captured every minute of that half hour, Festerocious
Your observations keen
Your writing seems effortless
m n m n I [312]04/02/2010
A very interesting "story" without a plot... blending some casual observations with poignant
reflections on music, social mores and... 

BTW, I'm just curious.  John was away from the cafe for half an hour and he asked Bob to watch it for
him, and Bob did just that...watching it for half an hour.  Was he supposed to serve the customers while
he was "watching"?  Ha!
bobchoi [504]04/02/2010
Bobchoi.

You are correct.
The cafe owner had asked him to basically keep an eye on things, serve the customers and make sure nothing
went wrong.

The observation I'm trying to make is that so many people in the world have their own opinions and ideas
but are lazy and not prepared to do anything about it.

Do as I say, not as I do.

Just like the modern politicians...  :D
Festerocious [55]04/02/2010
Festerocious, What a charming, intelligent good looking chap you are. Thank you very much for your kind
comments on my random scribblings, you brightened up what threatened to be a standard uneventful day.
It was like being released into the sunlight after having been trapped in the reception area of an old
people's home for 3 hours.
churchmouse [142]04/02/2010
>>> It was like being released into the sunlight after having been trapped in the reception area
of an old people's home for 3 hours.

. . . ROFL, so funny Churchmouse . . .

. . . so true about Festerocious' comment about opinions, laziness and that creature known as 'politician'.

Grampa
Grampa Pogi [512]04/02/2010

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