Alphabeticalove

Alphabeticalove

By Dorian [41]

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Alphabeticalove - 

       ---- A Haiku string 
            Chronicling loves flourish
            From fledgling to flight ----

Alone, the young girl
Boots and bright sunny loving
Could i have dreamt it?

Diligent young boy
Everything, for him, to change
Fright, flounder: feel

Gut instinct, react
Hurt her; ignorance, not bliss
I'm sorry; no calls

Jump-start the still heart
Know when to discern; head, heart
Love: against the grain

Mendacity, no
Not with Elysian love 
Open heart and home

Ponder the complex
Question the feelings we have. 
Roam the heart's dark fringe

Satchel: a simple thing
To me: your exuberant
Undertone; your shine

Virtues of love are?
Wonderment at another
Xenogenous love

Yourself in itself; your entirety I love; your brightness my light
Zeugma: i kiss you; too, your unique open soul; champion: no fight

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Comments, critiques and replies

TitleByDate
Dorian, I read all of your postings.  They are demanding pieces.  There are parts in each that I have
read over and still don't quite understand.  Perhaps, symbolism or abstractions of some sort (?)
bobchoi [504]09/02/2010
Sure thing 'Bobchoi', i know it does seem a bit abstract but i would hate you to think that i was one
of those pretentious, uber-verbose writers who writes incomprehensible poems and then just says:

' I wouldn't like to expatiate, on this poem, as I feel a description would taint it some way' (elkapan)

I will admit that this specific poems reading is relatively esoteric, I posted it, more for a critique
of my use of Haiku form than to express it's content. But to prove that it does mean something i will
expand on the final Haiku, 'Zeugma...no fight'

i am applying the two subjects, 'you' (concrete), and, 'soul' (abstract), under the same verb, 'kiss',
to exemplify the concept of Zeugma (a literary term). In terms of interpretation, it is my way of saying
to my girlfriend (the development of our relationship being the subject) that although we had a confusing
start, i now love her; her physical, and her abstract, and that nothing beyond her can compete for that
love. 

I don't want to go on too much about stuff you may not be interested in so rather than expand on all the
writing i have posted i would propose that you ask a few more questions with direct relevance to elements
you don't understand and i can explain accordingly.

I appreciate the time you have taken to read through my work and understand from your profile that you
are a committed, experienced writer; advice from whom i could no doubt benefit. I hope your interest in
my work hasn't been wavered by my waffling on as i would love a chance extend a critical discourse, since
i believe there to be no better critique than
that of those who are compelled out of interest
rather than occupation, to read.
Dorian [41]09/02/2010
nice =)
audreyhepburn [467]09/02/2010
Thanks Audrey 
;)
Dorian [41]09/02/2010

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