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i liked this, it had a lot of poignancy to it. only criticism i would make would be that yuo say 'toil' in the third stanza: do you mean 'toll'? apart from that, brilliant
:)
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I like this poem because something's personal is being conveyed; but I don't know if the message "I am what you are" is something I can believe in
Why would you want to be somebody else, especially if that somebody else does not like what you are, out of ignorance?
The problem is in the biased person's mind and not in yours
Why own the other person's bias?
Why want to be what the other person is? How do you achieve that?
It's like a dog chasing its tail
You are what you are, and your difference, and our differences, is what make this world beautiful
The problem is in the other person's mind
Why make it your own problem?
Be at peace with yourself . . .
m n m n I
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I don't think blacks wanted to be white
They only wanted to be understood and treated as human beings with the same rights, privileges and opportunities
I won't even think that they wished they were white
It would just fan the hatred, if they did
The closed mind takes a while to open
Unfortunately, too long . . .
m n m n I
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This says a lot, but i agree with mnmnI's comment, no one will like to be someone else especially if he/she hates that someone.
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Thanks. I was kind of upset when I wrote this so that's why I said I wanted to be like someone else. I wrote 'I seek to become what you are' because when I was writing to me it seemed that that's the only accepted form of a person, and that everyone should look like each other. I was just in the moment I'm fine now.
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Iram, happy to know that you're fine now. If something bothers you, write something about it... it makes you feel better... as you must have found out by now. You can say it's "writing therapy".
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This peom was very well written, good job:)
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