I hesitated t post this chapter for the very reasons you mentioned. But I felt it needed work to pull it from being too erotic....
Strangely enough, I"m better at this than writing the sensuous fluffy stuff.
I don't know why it doesn't translate into paragraphs when I copy and paste. The entire ms I pasted is full of paragraphs. Each dialog is a new paragraph along with every change in pov. I guess I need to go through it line by line-frustrating.
Ironically enough, the ms from chapter seven on to 14 is sensuously erotic but not on this level by any stretch of the imagination. i will torturously rewrite-as I knew deep down I had to do! (Observe head hanging in abject resignation. ;) )
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