The Writers' Circle

I'm working on writing a series of three books about werewolves and this is the interlude to the first book which I call Crimson Moon: Awakening.... This is just the rough draft of the interlude to the first book. I'm trying to introduce the idea that this is a fantasy story as well as grasp the readers attention. The events that unfold here in the intro do play an important role in the plot and are often times mentioned later throughout the story. If you have any advice please let me know. I'd appreciate it.


The moon was resting low in the night sky. Her full silver glow illuminated a small city that was tucked securely away in the dense forested foothills branching from the nearby mountains. Out done by her radiance, the stars desperately stretched their silver arms to the faint yellow city lights below, almost as if they were trying to pull them out of harm's way. The moon's light held them at bay; tonight was her night. 
     The moon whispered gently to the trees standing guard at the top of a hill. They shivered nervously as the rush of wind slithered through their branches. A dark shadow saw their uneasiness and heard her whisper. Silently through the dead leaves and underbrush it crept. 
     Its hunger gnawed at the walls of its stomach sending a sharp biting sensation through its abdomen. The shadow cringed in pain and gritted its teeth. It needed to feed. It flared its nostrils and thrust its nose high into the air. The smell of prey played with its wet taste buds. Its stomach churned with delight. It turned to the moon with pleading eyes; she was faithful and did not abandon her shadow, but instead showed it the way with a pale silver finger pointing to the sleeping city below. 


     In the outer proximities of the city, while everyone else was sleeping or heading home after working the late shift, there was still one bar where someone was present. One by one the lights went out inside the bar. A shadow moved behind the pastel stained-glass windows toward the heavy red oak double doors which shared the same stained-glass floral motif as the windows. It paused a moment then the neon pink "Open" sign hanging on the rusty-red brick wall outside also flickered and went out. The shadow, a young girl, scanned the room one last time with weary eyes. 
     The walls were covered with all sorts of musical memorabilia; other old antiques such as ancient street lights and thin spidery bicycles and dated ads for products that had long since been discontinued were hung in complete disarray any place where there was space on the walls. Despite the disorder, the whole bar had a sort of homely feel to it. The walls themselves were the same rusty-red brick that was outside except for the light cream colored walls behind the bar counter and karaoke stage. Low hanging light fixtures, made of the same frosty stained-glass as the windows, hung low above the tables and bar counter.  After having been swept and mopped, the dark brown oak floors glistened in the faint light seeping from beneath the swinging kitchen door in the back and the colorful glow of the neon alcohol signs that were dispersed on the walls. Each chair was perched upside down on the edge of their designated table; their long dark wooden legs stretched toward the ceiling. All the wires on the karaoke stage were untangled; each microphone was put up in their stands and everything else appeared to be in order as well. The girl sighed tiredly with relief as she pushed her hand through her short brown hair and rested her eyes for a brief moment. 
     She glanced at the clock on the wall; it read two o'clock in the morning. It certainly had been a long day. On long slim legs she glided toward the kitchen door, her crimson gator skin heels clicking against the hard wood floors; the thought of getting to go home and sink into her warm soft bed made her hasten. She couldn't keep doing this every night, but thankfully she could just take her time off tomorrow to relax. 
     She paused a moment with one hand resting against the kitchen door and looked over her shoulder at the dim room one last time. She decided everything was in well enough condition and pushed through the door into the gleaming chrome interior of the kitchen. The sudden change in light made her flinch for a moment and made her eyes blink rapidly. She quickly reached for the light switch beside the door and flipped half of the kitchen lights off. Her body relaxed a little as she rolled her shoulders and flipped her bangs out of her eyes. As she strolled to the back door, her jaw dropped and she yawned heavily; warm wet tears blurred her vision but she quickly blinked them away and carefully wiped beneath her eyes as to prevent the smearing of her mascara and eyeliner. Hopefully she would be able to make it home without drifting off behind the wheel. 
     She grabbed her black gator skin purse that was sitting on the stainless steel counter by the back door, unzipped it, and dug around in her purse for the keys. Her reflection in the counter top below mirrored her every movement. After a moment of frustration she finally found her keys. She threaded her finger through the key ring and wrapped her hand around the jingling metal as she threw her purse on her shoulder and adjusted it. 
     The back door creaked on its hinges as she pulled it open stepping into the dark musty alley way outback and flipped the switch to the remaining lights inside. Suddenly a bleak darkness surrounded her. Only a dim moth covered light at the end of the alley lit the small gloomy corridor with its shallow yellow glow. 
     The alley walls were streaked with sickly yellow and green colored stains that had been dripping along the pipes and cords nailed to the walls, and the musty vapor of mold and decay drifted to her sensitive nose from the dumpster and the massive pile of black trash bags stacked along the wall. Every corner was a deep shadow which concealed a swarm of insects and parasite ridden vermin that fed on the rot, who knew what else crept in those shadows. Her stomach churned uneasily and her spine tingled; she quickly shut the door behind her and went to lock it.  Something squealed and darted from one shadow to the next, disturbing the oil filled puddle near the dumpster; her keys fell to the cracked concrete with a muffled clank as she jumped in startled fright and whirled around to face the direction in which she heard the noise.
     She had to quit being so paranoid. She had heard too many horror stories about young girls like herself being attacked in places like this to relax though. The shadows were quite; nothing moved. Slowly she bent over to pick up her keys. When her fingers were about two inches away from them she quickly swept them up and turned to lock the door again, frantically sifting through numerous keys to find the match for the lock.
     The moth covered light flickered a little as if it were threatening to go out on her, and her back quivered almost as if someone where watching her. Her heart started to pound against her ribs as she glanced at the light then back at the keys in her hand.  All over her body, chills ran across her skin and made her hair stand on end; she could feel the hole being drilled into her spine by covetous eyes. Her breathing became heavy and broken, she was too afraid to turn around to see if anyone was there or not. There never had been anyone there before, but then again, she had never felt this kind of overwhelming fear before.
     She heard a soft thud in the shadows and again she whirled around to face the darkness; a black shape disappeared into the shadows. Her whole body started to shake uncontrollably, her breathing becoming more frantic. She scanned the darkness and saw nothing, but she just knew something was there. A deep rumble traveled though the ground and up through her body. The light flickered in sync with the rapid beating of her heart.
     The moon peeked down into the alley between the tall black outlines of the buildings stretching upward toward the sky. A faint silver glow illuminated the shadows. Two glistening eyes belonging to some massive black figure reflected red light like rubies in the weak luster of the moon. Then the figure growled and spread its lips to reveal two rows of jagged teeth gleaming in the moonlight as it moved forward toward her. 
     She lost herself in panic; dropping everything, she turned to run. The figure sprung from its place in the shadows to the fire escape above her, landing with a loud crash. She dropped to the ground screaming; her ears pounded violently from the explosion, but she had to get up and run.  The colossal black shape watched her for a moment as she scrambled to her feet, clawing at the ground, crying uncontrollably. What the hell was that thing?! She managed to get to her feet and started to run again. The fire escape creaked as the thing positioned itself to jump. She looked up. The thing was in mid air; its fully extended body was an enormous black silhouette against the moonlight. It glided effortless over her then landed with a heavy thud between her and the street. It had blocked off her only escape. 
     She could see it now- the beast. It stalked forward emitting a low rumble from its throat. Her heart beat furiously against her ribs almost as if it were going to break them open. There was no way this could be real. The muscles in its shoulder tensed as it crouched low to the ground, its eyes filled with bloodlust. She took a step backward, the tears streaming down her gentle pink cheeks. She mumbled pleas for mercy through her sobs. It was in position. It was still as a statue except for the anticipation that quivered across the surface of its skin. She took another step back ward, her heel caught in a crack in the concrete and she fell. Something within its body snapped. The thing sprung forward and then-